How can erection problems affect your relationship?

Erection problems can affect more than your sex life. They can also affect confidence, intimacy and communication within a relationship. If you are experiencing erection problems (EPs), also known as erectile dysfunction (ED), you are not alone, and neither you nor your partner is to blame.Many men find it difficult to talk about erectile dysfunction, but avoiding the conversation can sometimes make the emotional impact feel worse over time.

How can erection problems make you or your partner feel?

Experiencing EPs can affect relationships in many different ways. Talking openly with your partner is often an important first step towards understanding what is happening and finding support together.

Confidence and self-esteem

Erection problems can knock your confidence and self-esteem. Some men feel frustrated, embarrassed or anxious about intimacy after experiencing erectile dysfunction.

It is also common to start avoiding physical intimacy because of worries about what might happen during sex. Unfortunately, silence and avoidance can sometimes create emotional distance in a relationship.

Talking openly can help relieve pressure and remind both partners that erection problems are common and treatable.

Partners think it is their fault

Your partner may ask themselves questions like:

“Does he not find me attractive anymore?”
"Is something wrong in our relationship?"

In many cases, erection problems are linked to physical health conditions, stress, anxiety or other everyday pressures rather than attraction. Open communication can help avoid misunderstandings and reassure your partner about what is happening.

Erection problems can feel like a threat to your relationship

Erection problems can place strain on a relationship if they are ignored for a long period of time. Frustration, confusion and resentment may build if neither partner understands what the other is going through.

However, many couples find that talking honestly about erectile dysfunction helps them feel more supported and connected. Instead of trying to handle erection problems alone, approaching them together can make a real difference.

Talking to your partner about erection problems

It is natural not to want to talk about erectile dysfunction. Many men hope the problem will simply go away on its own. But without support or treatment, erection problems may continue, and silence can make the situation feel more isolating.

Remember, you are not alone. Around 15 million men in the UK suffer from erection problems (EPs)¹

Erection problems can happen regularly or only occasionally and may be linked to:

Cardiovascular disease
High blood pressure
Diabetes
Stress and anxiety
Depression

Lifestyle factors such as smoking or alcohol

In some cases, erectile dysfunction may also be an early sign of an underlying health condition.

How to talk to your partner about EPs

Think carefully about when and where you want to talk. Choose a calm, neutral place without distractions rather than starting the conversation in the bedroom or before going to sleep.

It is important to be open and honest with each other. Try to approach the conversation as something you are facing together. Using words like “we” instead of “you” can help keep the conversation supportive rather than confrontational.

For example

"We should talk about what's been happening."
"We're going through something together."

If you are the partner of someone experiencing EPs, starting with “I” statements such as “I’m worried about how you’re feeling” may help encourage open discussion.

What if the conversation becomes difficult?

Talking about erection problems can feel emotional and vulnerable. Not every conversation will go perfectly the first time.

If things become tense, it is often better to pause and come back to the conversation later rather than forcing it. The goal is to keep communication open and supportive.

Stay positive

Having a conversation about erection problems can be the beginning of something better for both of you.

As well as talking openly together, speaking to a pharmacist or doctor about erectile dysfunction can help you understand possible causes and treatment options.

Viagra Connect^® tablets, Viagra Connect^® Melts and Avarante^® are available online and in UK pharmacies without a prescription. These treatments support the blood flow needed to get and keep an erection when sexually aroused and are effective for many men experiencing erectile dysfunction.

Lifestyle changes such as stopping smoking, reducing alcohol intake and exercising regularly may also help improve erection problems.

¹Based on 45% of UK men self-identifying as having an erection problem (Toluna, Viagra Connect research UK, July 2025; n=3000), applied to UK male population (~33.1 million; ONS)

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